Sunday, August 21, 2011

I think I can.

I've said it before...I'm a planner & an organizer.  I'm not a fan of change, drama, or debate.  I stress out when things don't go as planned.  It's the way I am.  I've tried to change, but I can't...no matter how hard I try....and believe me, lots of prayers have gone up (and are going up as I type).  I wish I could hit rewind and go back 16 weeks to when my baby boy was just two days old, and we were settling with our new family of four and new routines.  That is a change I could handle :)
I freak out when I'm under pressure. I have panic attacks when I'm in a large crowd & can't get out. I hyperventilate when I see snakes. I stress over how we're going to make it to visit everyone on holidays when we live 150 miles from our families. I worry about getting my classroom ready for each new school year. I dread leaving Joel when I go back to work tomorrow.  Juggling a full time job with too many changes to name, two kids...one with fourth grade homework & playing soccer three times a week and an almost 4-month-old baby...cooking dinner, keeping the house somewhat clean/organized, and making time for a ten-minute conversation with Dan before we all go to bed at the end of the night is not going to be easy, but I suppose I'm up for the challenge. I'm just praying praying and drawing on inner strength from above to get through all of this.
In the words of a favorite story I read to my kindergarten kids every year: I think I can...I think I can...I think I can... 
Good night ;)

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